This is a brief series on fuzzy hope -- when you want something but you don't know what it is. Just a couple more. To get it automatically in your inbox, go HERE.
I'm afraid of heights. Can NOT even look over a ledge. Uh-uh, no way.
Bridgebuilders love heights. Here's a description of the builders of the Brooklyn Bridge from "The Great Bridge" by David McCullough:
No man can be a bridgebuilder who must educate his nerves. It must be a constitutional gift . . . They must plant their feet by instinct . . . and be able to look down hundreds of feet without a muscle trembling.
That's not me, and it may not be you, but I do have a 'constitutional gift' and an ability to plant my feet by instinct in some areas, and so do you.
The "What do you really want" question is trying to get you to that area.
Here are a few more questions to chase your fuzzy hope. You're not looking for an aha! moment. You're looking for clues, for threads.
When do you feel most alive?
Think back over the last week, the last month, and over your life as much as you can remember. What were you doing, what was the situation when you felt so alive?
If you knew you would succeed -- if God said "Pick and I'll bless it!" -- what would you do?
Just pretend of course. Isn't it fun to pretend? Since it's only pretend, go ahead and answer the question.
When do you get encouraging, positive responses from people?
What happened for them to respond that way? Again, think back over weeks and years. Anything consistent there?
"I've always wanted to . . ."
To what? What do you keep thinking about over the years that has never changed. It's not a phase. You think you're just dreaming and being unrealistic, but are you?
Another way to ask these same questions:
What have you loved doing? And not just loved it but you were good at it. And you know you were good at it because people told you.
This is the part where you take serious what I said about not expecting a traditionally defined box or role or job or skill. If you expect something predictable, you might say, "I'm not good at anything."
And that would be a lie.
You were created in God's image with creativity and the urge to make a mark and bear fruit. You have a 'constitutional gift' and an ability to plant your feet by instinct somewhere, somehow. Guaranteed. Don't limit it to a job description.
* * *
I'm reading Jon Acuff's book "Quitter." Jon is thinking more of a 'dream job' rather than the inner compulsion, assignment-to-a-corner-of-the-pool that I think a fuzzy hope is, but he made me think of another way of looking at it.
He talks about finding the thing you're looking for as a 'recovery' more than than 'discovery.'
So maybe you're already familiar with it. Your fuzzy hope is an old friend you've forgotten. You danced with it. You never took it serious, or maybe you did but only for awhile. You hear its voice now and you realize it's been talking to you for a long time but you haven't been listening.
What's the old friend saying?
Next: What to expect on your fuzzy hope safari